Research says yes.
I bet when you think of all the things that might be holding you back from attaining the life you desire –career, relationship, love, friendships, support, health, creativity, finances, etc.– you don’t automatically put self judgment at the top of your list.
In fact, many high achieving people, perfectionists included, think that negative self talk is beneficial.
But the research shows a different story:
“The #1 barrier [to a willingness to learn how to release self judgment and learn] self-compassion is fear of being complacent and losing your edge. And all the research shows that’s not true. It’s just the opposite,”Dr. Kristin Neff, Associate Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin
In fact, according to Dr. Neff, there are five myths about self-compassion that keep us stuck in the negative mindset loop.
- Self-compassion is a form of self pity. ➡️ The research shows that compassion and pity are actually near enemies. Pity is a form of separation, while compassion allows us to see ourselves and all of humanity as imperfect evolving beings.
- Self-compassion is a sign of weakness. ➡️ The research shows that self-compassion leads to higher levels of resilience, inner strength, and achievement.
- Self-compassion will lead to self-indulgence. ➡️ The research shows that replacing self-judgment with self-compassion is actually linked to healthier behaviors.
- Self-compassion is selfish. ➡️ Research shows that self-compassionate people have more concern for and are more caring and supportive and forgiving … and that this is reciprocated in their relationships.
- Self-compassion will undermine my motivation ➡️ The research shows that self-compassion is actually linked to higher motivation. Our personal standards remain high but we have less fear of failure and more grit and determination to succeed.
Let’s look at another researcher:
“Self-criticism can take a toll on our minds and bodies. It can lead to ruminative thoughts that interfere with our productivity, and it can impact our bodies by stimulating inflammatory mechanisms that lead to chronic illness and accelerate aging.”–Dr. Richard Davidson, founder and director of the Center for Healthy Minds at the University of Wisconsin-Madison
Does that sound like something you want in your life?
Choose to interrupt those negative patterns and replace them with a new soundtrack.
Join me in the month of March for a 30-Day Self Judgment Detox Challenge.
$27 will get you in … but only for a limited time.
This challenge will guide you through:
- A four step detox process
- Four + practices to honor and release old wounds
- Meditations and creative practices for healing old stories
- Self forgiveness
- The principles of self-compassion
You will get:
- Bi-weekly emails with specific instruction to help you detox from your self-judgment loop
- Made for you matrixes and journal prompts to help you track your journey
- Encouragement and inspiration
- Optional Bonus: Personal check-ins from me via email or text